2020 August 11 Flee Fly Fo Fom

Tuesday

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  • It was still in the low 80s this morning. So, after breakfast, we sat on the porch and read the devotion for today. Eventually the sun on my back went out of the comfort zone and into the uncomfortable zone. That’s when I decided it was time to retreat inward and activate the air conditioner.

Photo from the web
  • Along with the fruit that we purchased yesterday, we also received a small cloud of fruit flies. I did not then, nor do I now, intend to raise fruit flies for fun and profit. Though some scientists study these tiny pests, I know if no nearby laboratories who are currently in the market for more specimens. So my options seem to be: (1) politely ask them to vacate the premieres, (2) forcibly evict them, or dispatch them to their Lord of the flies.
  • Having chosen the 3rd option, I then set about implementing that plan. My first method of elimination was to individually stalk and eliminate. Though this method was thoroughly satisfying, as it brought out that primitive man-as-hunter instinct, it was ultimately an ineffective method of eradicating the wee besties.
  • Having done exhaustive online research, (okay, I fell into some figurative rabbit holes and wandered far afield) I discovered that they can lay up to 500 eggs at a time. If that we’re not a disheartening enough statistic, from an egg that hatches in hours, to adult in 8 to 10 days. I nearly feel sorry for the little fly parents. Imagine going from the terrible twos to rebellious teens in a matter of days – with 500 children. <shudder>. But not sorry enough to live with their offspring and the offspring offspring and … well you get it.
  • So, what to do, what to do? I asked the smartest person I know, my Google Assistant. Magically a website was suggested, “10 Ways to be Rid of Fruit Flies.” Suggestions were along the lines of, get rid of the fruit and clean the house. I’m not about to do either of those radical things, so there. 😝 blllaaaat!
  • A second site says to put apple vinegar in a bowl covered with plastic wrap. Then punch a few holes in the plastic. In theory the critters will be attracted to the fermented apple scent, crawl through the small hole and be trapped.
  • Evidently, like some humans, they don’t know how to get themselves out of a hole they’ve gotten themselves into. My concern is, if this only traps them, what am I to do with them? Drive them into the country and release them? Do flies have homing instincts that let them return to the place of their birth?
  • ANY SUGGESTIONS ARE WELCOME. ACTUALLY THE MORE BIZAARE, THE BETTER.

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  • God bless and g’day.
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  • ©2020 Thomas E. Williams

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